To Those Who Are Bitter...

I understand that not everyone has had success in the area of marriage... people change, do bad things and a lot of times just give up and forget what they once had... I'm not writing this to point fingers or tell anyone that its their fault that their marriage didn't work out. 

I am however, writing this to stand up for the newlyweds who keep getting put down. 

Taking your negative experiences with marriage & patronizing those who are giving it an honest shot, by making snide comments or blatantly saying  

"you will never make it." is not only rude & a nasty display of your bitterness but it's a blast in Gods face. You're telling God that he didn't know what he was doing when he designed & created marriage, that His will isn't good enough for anyone.

I have heard it all & I know my friends & family who have been recently married have heard similar, if not, the same...

"You're too young!"

"You don't know what love is..."

"You have so much to get out of your system.."

"You're making a mistake!"

"Just wait til he cheats"

or we are chastised for the way we operate our marriage...

"Girl, dont be doing his laundry"

"You seriously cook dinner for him every night?" 

"Man, you should tell her you're going! Don't ask"

"Y'all don't need to talk about everything"

"Girl, the man isnt "the head", he don't own you!"

"Girl, you aint a dog, you don't need to submit to him"

I could go on & on...

Maybe if young love saw more old love ...

Love that has made it through the wringer and continues to endure the world & make it through every storm. Love that doesn't just wimp out when things get the slightest bit tough... love that follows Gods instructions for a healthy marriage. These examples would provide more hope & confidence for those just starting out.

It takes work! Lots of work! 

I know the majority of today's generation doesn't know what that is but that isn't just their fault... they only know what they were raised by.

For the minority who do know what hard work is & have genuine examples of old love to look up to, we are trying! With our eye on the prize, we have no regrets for missing out on what the world has to offer outside of marriage. 

We don't have any care to indulge in the things that aren't an investment to our future & our hearts. 

We aren't here forever & we don't have the time or heart to waste on lonely drunk nights, meaningless multiple partners, & fake friends. 

You know, the stuff  you say "we are missing out on" or "need to get out of out system."

We have a desire to obey His will & guard our hearts, our minds, & our bodies. To fulfill His command to get married & be faithful to one another. To be fruitful & multiply, to raise children in the ways of the Lord. 

We know that with Gods example we can make it!

Marriage should mimic Gods love & commitment to the church (His people). Gods patience, mercy, forgiveness, love, & intimacy He has for His people. This is exactly what we need to strive for in our daily journey in a life long marriage. God gave us all He had, and time & time again we hurt Him, and yet He still accepts us back when we have gone astray, forgives us, loves us & helps us every day. And He doesn't just tell us to get married & then leave us hanging, either... He gave us all the instructions we need in His word. Us women don't submit because we are week-minded or lazy & our husbands don't take charge as the head of the family because they are power hungry monsters. We take up these roles because He tells us to, along with many other guidelines. Its worked for hundreds of years... I don't see why we should change it now.

We have no greater example than His.

So instead of attempting to crush our dreams of a healthy life long marriage or tell us our way (Gods way) is wrong, I ask you to dig deep, change your attitude & take the lessons you learned & help others to not make the same mistakes as you and/or your partner did. Being a positive reinforcement for us. Taking your negative & making it a positive by glorifying God through it all & helping those who are trying, that is the blessing He needs you to be.

Being bitter & negative is only doing the work of Satan & wasting time.

To those who are trying - Keep on keepn' on! You've got this!

Romans 8:31

Whats shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?